Can I be an active person, and relax, too?
By
Joyce M. Gayles, Ph.D.*

Stress and burnout. These words evoke unpleasant images of too many things to be done, nagging headaches, restless sleep, and irritable mood. The buildup of physical and emotional tension can result in more than sleeplessness and irritability. Being under stress with no relief increases your susceptibility to serious and/or recurring illnesses.

Anyone who is experiencing a lot of change, particularly in a short period of time, will likely experience stress. Such changes include changes in relationships, changes in finances (up or down), loss of a job or a new job, geographical moves, global changes. Even the changes that result from desirable experiences, like a new baby or the holidays, can be a major source of stress.

Despite all the above mentioned bad news about stress, the good news is that stress can be managed. Using the following suggestions can lower the levels of stress in your life.

IDENTIFY THE STRESSOR, if possible. For instance, if driving in rush hour traffic is a source of stress, you may be able to use flex-time to go to work earlier or later. If the sources of stress in your life cannot be eliminated, then it is most helpful to concentrate on stress-reducing techniques such as:

REASSESS YOUR PRIORITIES. Make a concerted effort to become aware of your own self-demanding patterns. Identify the point at which your desires for achievement change to compulsion or your caring expressions become caretaking. Begin to pace yourself. Learn to delegate tasks. Allow yourself time to play and have fun.

REST AND RELAX. Begin to pamper yourself. Take a relaxing bath at least once a week. Back off from using "false cures" (e.g., alcohol, stimulants) to relax or to regain energy. See a psychotherapist to learn deep muscle relaxation or self-hypnosis for relaxation. Regular sessions with a massage therapist would also be helpful.

RETRAIN YOUR THINKING. Negative thinking increases feelings of stress. Thinking positively helps you feel more in control in stressful situations and enables you to find workable solutions. Read self-help books that teach you to change your thinking patterns or see a therapist who specializes in cognitive restructuring.

CREATE A SUPPORT NETWORK. People with strong support networks cope with stress better. Find people to talk to about what you're going through. Appropriately and regularly expressing your feelings of frustration, anger, or confusion helps prevent the "build-up/blow-up" syndrome. If you are experiencing a very difficult time with stress, consider adding a professional therapist to your support network

*Published in News on the Move, May 1990